Writing a Eulogy

I got an email from a friend who asked if I knew any good books with eulogy templates and pre-written speeches.  I had to answer honestly.  I don’t.

I have read some decent books on how to write a eulogy, some specializing in eulogies for parents, grandparents, children, etc.  But I’ve never found a book with pre-written memorial speeches that you could put the deceased’s name in and think that you would be honoring them in any way.

There’s a book called A Eulogy to Remember (we offer it here on this site) that has a good explanation of the steps you should take when writing a eulogy, and it does contain thematic outlines, and some sample speeches, but never goes as far as giving you a speech to fill in the blanks.

if you don’t know what to say, or if you are too busy with other funeral preparations to take the time to write a speech that can pay tribute to your loved one, then you should respectfully decline to do the eulogy.

This is one of my favorite funeral poems.  it is generally attributed to Henry Van Dyke, but I have seen it listed as other authors is some books and blogs.

Avoid using a poem that is very religious in nature, specially if you come from a family with varied religious beliefs.  I like this for the ending of a eulogy speech, because it gives the mourners a chance to look at death from their own individual religious, ethnic perspectives while all being able to see it as a positive thing.

A parable of immortality

A ship sails and I stand
Watching till she fades on the horizon
And someone at my side says,
“She is gone”.
Gone where?
Gone from my sight, that is all;
She is just as large as when I saw her.
The diminished size and total loss of sight
Is in me, not in her,
And just at the moment
When someone at my side says
“She is gone”
There are others who are watching her coming,
And other voices take up a glad shout
“There she comes!”